Domestic Violence, also known as Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) or domestic abuse, is one of the most common forms of violence. The chances that we know who someone has, or will experience domestic violence are alarmingly high. 

Anyone can be a victim or perpetrator of domestic violence.

While domestic violence can feel extremely scary and isolating, know that you are not alone and support is available. 

At Handel Behavioral Health, our trained therapists and counselors offer evidence-based treatments to support survivors of all ages heal and recover from the trauma reactions that many victims of crime and abuse experience. 

Our therapists are here to safely listen to your experiences and the choices that you are making or have made without judgment. 

To start working with one of our trained therapists online in Massachusetts or in-person from our offices in Amherst, Springfield, Wilbraham, Natick, and Franklin Massachusetts, please contact us today at (413) 343-4357.

Warning: If you are facing or witnessing abuse of any kind, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 for support. Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text “START” to 88788. You can also use the online chat.

What is Domestic Violence?

“Domestic violence is a pattern of abusive behavior in a relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power over the other partner. The abuser’s behaviors are meant to intimidate, manipulate, isolate, humiliate, coerce, blame, threaten, or injure the victim.”

– Jordan Castonguay, LMHC

Examples of domestic violence include:

• Physical abuse: any physically aggressive behavior: hitting, restraining, pushing, punching, kicking, beating 
• Sexual abuse: forcing or demanding an unwilling partner to engage in sex, demanding sexual acts that one partner does not consent to, interfering with birth control, or trying to get the partner pregnant without consent
• Coercion: making the victim feel guilty, pushing the victim into decisions, manipulating other family members or children, insisting on being right, making the rules and forcing the victim to follow them 
• Emotional abuse: any behavior that exploits another’s vulnerability, insecurity, or character: not respecting the victim’s feelings, rights, or opinions, constant criticism, humiliating remarks, not responding to what the victim is saying, mocking, name-calling, yelling, swearing, or interrupting 
• Verbal abuse: abusive language used to denigrate, embarrass, or threaten the victim of abuse: gaslighting, name-calling, threatening, constantly correcting, interrupting, belittling, and demeaning 
• Financial abuse: controlling the victim through manipulation of economic resources: not paying the bills, refusing to give the victim money, preventing the victim from working, refusing to work and support the family, or destroying the victim’s credit
• Technological abuse: using technology to control and stalk the victim: monitoring the victims social media, tracking devices to victims location/phone calls/messages/emails, hacking into the victims personal accounts, or forcing the victim to share passwords 
• Abuse by Immigration Status: abusive behaviors used against immigrant victims: destroying the victim’s immigration papers, restricting the victim from learning English, threatening to have the victim deployed, threatening to hurt the victim’s home country and/or family.
• Elder abuse: abuse and/or neglect of an older person by someone who has a relationship with them (spouse, child, sibling, other relative, close friend) or abuse/neglect of an older person by a legal caregiver/provider

How Does Domestic Violence Affect Mental Health?

Abuse can have lasting effects on an individual’s mental health and wellbeing. 

Victims of domestic violence might feel shame, embarrassment, helplessness, confusion, and low self-esteem from their abusive partner. These can lead to more serious mental health conditions, including:

• Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

“A victim of domestic violence might display signs of PTSD: always checking for the exit when they’re out of the house, scanning their environment for their partner, or being especially jumpy and on edge.”

–Kaitlin Corson, LMHC with HBH

• Major Depressive Disorder

“A victim might display signs of depression: distancing themselves from their friends and family members, and withdraw from activities that previously brought them joy.”

-Jordan Castonuay, LMHC

• Anxiety Disorder

“The abuser’s psychological tactics of manipulation can result in severe anxiety for the victim. The abuser might constantly make the victim feel like they’re in the wrong, or they’re the crazy one. The abuser might also try to convince the victim’s loved ones that they’re a healthy partner through giving the victim gifts, compliments, affection, and attention when the victim’s loved ones are around.”

-Kaitlin Corson, LMHC

Additionally, children growing up in homes with intimate partner violence are more at risk for poor physical health, mental health problems, and behavioral problems.

What Does Therapy for Domestic Violence Involve?

A domestic violence relationship is extremely isolating and scary. Therapy provides a safe and confidential space for victims to process what they’re experiencing without judgment. 

A trained therapist offers victims of domestic violence effective coping skills and strategies to build confidence in their lives and develop healthy and positive relationships over time. 

Types of therapy for domestic violence can include: 

1. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy is a form of talk-therapy which helps the client identify the relationship between their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, and how they affect a person’s life situation. 

CBT can help a victim of domestic violence identify disordered thoughts, and use problem-solving skills to cope with challenging situations. It can help the victim better understand the reasoning behind their partner’s behavior. It can also help the victim develop a better sense of themselves and their ability to handle difficult circumstances.

2. Psychoeducation Therapy

Psychoeducation Therapy is a form of therapy that involves the therapist providing the client with information about their diagnosis or situation, symptoms, and treatment methods. This includes any potential risks that the client can expect. 

Rather than telling the client what they should do, the therapist gives the client accurate information about their diagnosis or situation and provides treatment options. This allows the client to collaborate with their therapist, and take ownership of the treatment plan/coping skills that fit their needs. 

The therapist will inform the client about the potential risks of both staying in and leaving their relationship. They will provide resources about local domestic violence support groups and domestic violence shelters: 

• The National Domestic Hotline
• Massachusetts Coalition for the Homeless: Statewide Domestic Violence Shelters
• Domestic Violence Program for Survivors 

The therapist will also help the client develop an effective safety plan should they decide to leave their abusive relationship: 

• A safe place to go in case of emergency, or if they need to leave home
• An excuse to leave if they feel threatened
• A list of emergency contacts: domestic violence shelter, domestic violence hotline, trusted friends and family members
• A code word/code phrases to alert family or friends if help is needed
• An escape bag of cash, social security documents, documentation records, keys, a change of clothes, toiletries

3. Eye-Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)

EMDR is a form of psychotherapy for trauma resolution which focuses directly on the patient’s memory of the event, and is intended to change the way the memory is stored in the patient’s brain. Successful EMDR therapy allows the patient to bring the traumatic memory to mind without experiencing distress. 

EMDR therapy can help a victim of domestic violence move from fear to a neutral feeling: reducing the impact of the memory on their psyche. The objective is not to erase the memory, but instead to decrease the emotional pain attached to it.

How Can a Victim of Domestic Violence Benefit from Working with a Therapist?

Mental health professionals can provide victims of domestic violence powerful tools and resources to find safety, healing and wellbeing. Domestic violence counseling can help individuals: 

• Build self-esteem to enhance feelings of worth
• Restore control over their situation and renew their hope for an improved life
• Heal from psychological abuse
• Develop assertiveness
• Build healthy boundaries
• Identify red flags in their relationships
• Develop new hobbies and tap into their strengths
• Reduce feelings and patterns of isolation
• Assist the victim in safely making the abuser accountable and responsible for their abuse
• Learn coping strategies to deal with traumatic events
• Motivate victims to implement a violence-free life for themselves and their loved ones

Start Domestic Violence Therapy Today

If you or your loved one is experiencing or has experienced domestic violence, know that help is available. You deserve compassionate, supportive, and professional support as you work through the complex experiences and symptoms of domestic violence.

Our therapists at Handel Behavioral Health are here to help you process all of the difficult emotions and experiences that may be preventing you from living an authentic and fulfilled life. 

Our therapists provide support without judgment, where you have total autonomy and control over your healing process. They will work collaboratively with you to establish therapeutic goals and create a treatment plan that is tailored to you as an individual.  

Contact us today at (413) 343-4357 or request an appointment online to start working with one of our therapists for domestic violence in Massachusetts today.

Warning: If you are facing or witnessing abuse of any kind, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 for support. Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text “START” to 88788. You can also use the online chat.

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